


meleth

by foxinsocksinabox



Category: Ookiku Furikabutte | Big Windup!, The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: M/M, Mention of injuries
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-21
Updated: 2017-06-21
Packaged: 2018-11-16 22:54:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11262705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foxinsocksinabox/pseuds/foxinsocksinabox
Summary: The fires of Mount Doom and the Black Gate are behind them, and the Ring is gone, it’s gone.Mihashi thinks he should feel relieved. After carrying that awful thing halfway across Middle-Earth, after hearing it whisper in his dreams for so long, he’s finally free. He should feel something other than exhaustion.





	meleth

**Author's Note:**

> for [multilinear](http://multilinear.dreamwidth.org), who prompted:
> 
> mihashi takes the ring to mordor. 
> 
> P.S. it has been a l o n g time since i saw lotr so... there are probably mistakes but \o/

The fires of Mount Doom and the Black Gate are behind them, and the Ring is gone, it’s _gone_.   
  
Mihashi thinks he should feel relieved. After carrying that awful thing halfway across Middle-Earth, after hearing it whisper in his dreams for so long, he’s finally free. He should feel something other than exhaustion.   
  
Instead, everything seems muted, greyed out at the edges. It’s a little like the few times he slipped into that ghostly not-World, when he put on the Ring- though he tries not to think about it, tries to focus on putting one foot in front of another.  
  
Honestly, he doesn’t have to try very hard. It’s an effort to just stay awake, considering Mihashi is exhausted and heavy and his hand is a throbbing ball of pain, and Abe is pulling him onwards like a horde of Uruk-hai are at their heels.   
  
He clears his throat once, twice. “A-Abe-kun?”  
  
Abe ignores him. Mihashi trips and stumbles on a loose pebble, but quickly regains his footing. Maybe he shouldn’t ask to stop- Abe always has a reason, right? Mihashi knows he wouldn’t have made it this far on his own, he trusts Abe with his life. But Abe’s grip is too tight on Mihashi’s good hand, and he doesn’t- he can’t continue like this.   
  
“Abe-kun, can- can we stop?”  
  
Abe stops like he’s hit a brick wall. Mihashi, who had just sped up to try and loosen the tautness between their arms- his shoulder aches- nearly crashes into his back instead.   
  
As he wobbles, too tired to have any sense of balance, Abe whirls on him.   
  
“Why, what’s wrong?” He barks, and Mihashi shrinks a little instinctively. “Is it your hand? Are you feeling dizzy? I knew I should have brought something to dull pain, I _knew it_ -”  
  
And Mihashi stands there in a daze, as Abe checks him over with vicious thoroughness, smacking a hand against his forehead to check for fever, peering closely into his eyes, growling unhappily at the dirty bandage around Mihashi’s left hand.   
  
It takes him much too long to realise that Abe is shaking.   
  
For the first time, Mihashi realises that Abe’s hand is ice cold around his wrist.  
  
“Abe-kun?” he murmurs, interrupting the barrage of questions, “Are- are you alright?”  
  
Abe drops Mihashi’s wrist like it burns him, and turns his head away- but not before Mihashi sees the way his face goes white under its tan, twists, _crumples_. Somewhere, despite his exhaustion, Mihashi still finds the energy to panic a little.  
  
“Don’t-” Abe snaps, when Mihashi reaches for him. He looks like he regrets it, though, when Mihashi’s hands snap back against his chest. Softer but no less raw, he says, “Don’t- I- I’m fine, I just- I just want to go home, alright? I just. I want to go home.”  
  
Somehow, he never thought that Abe would be as wrung out as he is. Mihashi feels like a plant left in the sun too long and leeched of moisture; limp and wilting. Of course Abe would want to go home.   
  
Mihashi hasn’t thought of the Shire in what feels like a lifetime. It seems like a paradise dream, now, after everything he’s seen.   
  
He doesn’t know if he can go back. Not with the taint of the Ring still so close.   
  
But he understands why Abe would want to- he thinks of pretty Shinooka with her apple-round cheeks and bright eyes, thinks of Abe’s loud and loving family. Why wouldn’t Abe want to return?   
  
Mihashi looks down at his dusty, scarred toes, and doesn’t have the strength to fight back the tears that come.   
  
He can hear Abe’s horrified noise, and covers his face. His shoulders hitch, and his hand hurts, and the world blurs into a mess of grey and Mihashi _cries_ , for the first time since they started this quest. He doesn’t know what he expects Abe to do- probably scold him, like all the times he did when they were faunts.   
  
But instead strong arms wrap around his shoulders, and then Abe is pulling him in, to rest against his chest. Mihashi breathes in, the smell of smoke and sweat, and underneath it the smell of rich dark earth just after the rain, and just cries harder.   
  
He doesn’t want to go home- not if it means giving up Abe to Shinooka, not if it means going home to an empty hobbit hole on Bagshot Row. What will he do? Will he dance at their wedding? Will he write a memoir? Will he learn to make lembas bread? Mihashi doesn’t know.   
  
So he clings to Abe and cries and cries, while Abe makes shushing noises in his ear.   
  
(Mihashi thinks he feels lips press against the crown of his head, but he’s surely imagining things.)   
  
Seemingly hours later, when Mihashi’s sobs quieten to the occasional hiccup of breath, Abe murmurs, “Hey.”  
  
Mihashi stiffens, and doesn’t answer.   
  
“Mihashi. Tell me. Please.”  
  
When Abe has that tone in his voice, nothing will dissuade him. Mihashi’s heard it too many times, all through his tweens and before. Abe won’t let him go without answering.   
  
He muffles his answer in Abe’s shirt, twisting his hands in the rough fabric. “I don’t. I can’t go home. I can’t.”  
  
“Why not?”  
  
Why not, he says. “Because I- I-” Because he’ll have nothing if he does, and at least here, even if he’s dirty, tired, and in pain, he has this. “Because…”  
  
“Mihashi-”  
  
“Because I can’t give you back to Shinooka!”  
  
Abe goes very, very still, and Mihashi feels a few more tears squeeze themselves from between his scrunched up eyelids. He holds on to Abe all the harder, because he knows at any moment Abe will step away, put some distance between them, and it’ll hurt. After all this time travelling together, looking out for each other, to have Abe pull away now will break him.   
  
It almost makes Mihashi want to go back to being the Ringbearer, because he can’t imagine a life without Abe in it.   
  
“What?” Abe sounds confused. “Shinooka? Who said anything about Shinooka?”  
  
Mihashi grits his teeth, shaking his head. “You- you like her don’t you? If we go back, you’ll marry her.”  
  
“ _What?_ ” Now, Abe’s hands slide to Mihashi’s biceps, pushing him away just enough that Mihashi has nowhere to hide. He keeps his head down instead, and his eyes closed. “ _Marry_ her- Mihashi what the hell are you talking about? I don’t want to marry Shinooka!”  
  
Mihashi stills. Finally, he tilts his head up so he can search Abe’s face just a bit- and his heart thuds at the confusion he sees. “You… don’t?”  
  
Abe growls a bit, but replies, “I don’t. How on earth do you even come up with these things?”  
  
“B-but. You- you’re always asking her to dance, and- and everyone says it’s. Just a matter of time!”  
  
Now, Abe is starting to look angry, and Mihashi cringes a little on instinct. “I don’t care what everyone says!” He snaps, “Shinooka and I are not- we’re not together, she doesn’t even _like_ me that way, and anyway that’s stupid because I love-”  
  
Mihashi looks up again, because Abe cut himself off so hard his teeth made an audible click as he shut his mouth.   
  
“You… love someone, Abe-kun?”  
  
And for all that he doesn’t want to give Abe up- Mihashi likes Shinooka. He doesn’t know what he’ll do if Abe’s fallen in love with someone who won’t let them remain friends.   
  
“I-” There’s a flush crawling up Abe’s neck, now, visible even under the smears of soot from the volcano. “I- yes.”  
  
Mihashi looks down and swipes a wrist over his eyes. “Oh.”  
  
And suddenly, Abe makes an aggravated noise, the same one that always precedes _I can’t believe I’m friends with you_ \- and then his hands are on Mihashi’s face. Mihashi only manages to squeak, shocked, before Abe’s mouth covers his, clumsy in his fierceness.  
  
Their teeth clack together painfully, and Abe pulls back, red-faced. But Mihashi just follows him, tilting his head just so and twining his good hand in Abe’s collar until they’re kissing again, the both of them more enthusiastic than skillful and not minding in the least.   
  
Then Mihashi tries to lace his bad hand through Abe’s hair, and bumps it against his skull instead.   
  
Searing pain shoots up his arm. Mihashi doesn’t know what happens except that his vision blacks out, and the next thing he knows he’s on his knees with his hand cradled gingerly to his chest, vision sparking from the agony. He can’t hear Abe through the pounding of blood in his skull, but he doesn’t need to, to read the terror and worry in his face.   
  
Then, a little painfully, Mihashi starts to giggle. And then to laugh.   
  
They’re barely five miles from Mordor. Mihashi has been paralysed and made into a meal and possessed and had his _finger bitten off_ , just in the last twenty-four hours. And Abe just kissed him. Mihashi doesn’t know how this is his life.   
  
There are- maybe- tears welling in his eyes, but he’s just so suddenly, dizzyingly happy. He’s trembling with it when Abe sighs and wraps an arm around his head.   
  
“Idiot,” he says, kissing his temple.   
  
Mihashi cannot be certain, but he thinks the shadow left from the Nazgul blade may have lifted. Just a little.

**Author's Note:**

> Come talk to me on [twitter!](http://www.twitter.com/foxrocksyrsocks)


End file.
